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We got a licking every time one of our snakes come in her way, and she allowed these lickings warn't nothing to what she would do if we ever loaded up the place again with them. I didn't mind the lickings, because they didn't amount to nothing; but I minded the trouble we had to lay in another lot. But we got them laid in, and all the other things; and you never see a cabin as as Jim's was when they'd all out for music and go for him. Jim didn't like the spiders, and the spiders didn't like Jim; and so they'd lay for him, and make it warm for him. And he said that between the rats and the snakes and the grindstone there warn't no room in bed for him, skasely; and when there was, a body couldn't sleep, it was so lively, and it was always lively, he said, because THEY never all slept at one time, but took turn about, so when the snakes was asleep the rats was on deck, and when the rats turned in the snakes come on watch, so he always had one gang under him, in his way, and t'other gang having a circus over him, and if he got up to hunt a new place the spiders would take a chance at him as he crossed over. He said if he ever got out this time he wouldn't ever be a prisoner again, not for a salary.
Well, by the end of three weeks everything was in pretty good shape. The shirt was sent in early, in a pie, and every time a rat bit Jim he would get up and write a little in his journal whilst the ink was fresh; the pens was made, the and so on was all carved on the grindstone; the bed-leg was sawed in two, and we had et up the sawdust, and it give us a most amazing stomach-ache. We reckoned we was all going to die, but didn't. It was the most undigestible sawdust I ever see; and Tom said the same. But as I was saying, we'd got all the work done now, at last; and we was all pretty much fagged out, too, but mainly Jim. The old man had wrote a couple of times to the below Orleans to come and get their nigger, but hadn't got no answer, because there warn't no such plantation; so he allowed he would advertise Jim in the St. Louis and New Orleans papers; and when he mentioned the St. Louis ones it give me the cold shivers, and I see we hadn't no time to lose. So Tom said, now for the nonnamous letters.
"What's them?" I says.
"Warnings to the people that something is up. Sometimes it's done one way, sometimes another. But there's always somebody spying around that gives notice to the governor of the castle. When Louis XVI. was going to light out of the Tooleries a servantgirl done it. It's a very good way, and so is the nonnamous letters. We'll use them both. And it's usual for the prisoner's mother to change clothes with him, and she stays in, and he slides out in her clothes. We'll do that, too."
"But looky here, Tom, what do we want to WARN anybody for that something's up? Let them find it out for themselves -- it's their ."
"Yes, I know; but you can't depend on them. It's the way they've acted from the very start -- left us to do EVERYTHING. They're so and mulletheaded they don't take notice of nothing at all. So if we don't GIVE them notice there won't be nobody nor nothing to with us, and so after all our hard work and trouble this escape 'll go off flat; won't amount to nothing -- won't be nothing TO it."
"Well, as for me, Tom, that's the way I'd like."
"Shucks!" he says, and looked disgusted. So I says:
"But I ain't going to make no complaint. Any way that suits you suits me. What you going to do about the servant-girl?"
"You'll be her. You slide in, in the middle of the night, and hook that yaller girl's frock."
"Why, Tom, that 'll make trouble next morning; because, of course, she prob'bly hain't got any but that one."
"I know; but you don't want it but fifteen minutes, to carry the nonnamous letter and shove it under the front door."
"All right, then, I'll do it; but I could carry it just as handy in my own togs."
"You wouldn't look like a servant-girl THEN, would you?"
"No, but there won't be nobody to see what I look like, ANYWAY."
"That ain't got nothing to do with it. The thing for us to do is just to do our DUTY, and not worry about whether anybody SEES us do it or not. Hain't you got no principle at all?"
"All right, I ain't saying nothing; I'm the servantgirl. Who's Jim's mother?"
"I'm his mother. I'll hook a gown from Aunt Sally."
"Well, then, you'll have to stay in the cabin when me and Jim leaves."
"Not much. I'll stuff Jim's clothes full of straw and lay it on his bed to represent his mother in disguise, and Jim 'll take the nigger woman's gown off of me and wear it, and we'll all together. When a prisoner of style escapes it's called an . It's always called so when a king escapes, f'rinstance. And the same with a king's son; it don't make no difference whether he's a natural one or an one."
So Tom he wrote the nonnamous letter, and I smouched the yaller wench's frock that night, and put it on, and shoved it under the front door, the way Tom told me to. It said:
Beware. Trouble is . Keep a sharp lookout. UNKNOWN FRIEND.
Next night we stuck a picture, which Tom drawed in blood, of a and crossbones on the front door; and next night another one of a on the back door. I never see a family in such a sweat. They couldn't a been worse scared if the place had a been full of ghosts laying for them behind everything and under the beds and shivering through the air. If a door banged, Aunt Sally she jumped and said "ouch!" if anything fell, she jumped and said "ouch!" if you happened to touch her, when she warn't noticing, she done the same; she couldn't face noway and be satisfied, because she allowed there was something behind her every time -- so she was always a-whirling around sudden, and saying "ouch," and before she'd got two-thirds around she'd whirl back again, and say it again; and she was afraid to go to bed, but she dasn't set up. So the thing was working very well, Tom said; he said he never see a thing work more satisfactory. He said it showed it was done right.
So he said, now for the grand ! So the very next morning at the of dawn we got another letter ready, and was wondering what we better do with it, because we heard them say at supper they was going to have a nigger on watch at both doors all night. Tom he went down the lightning-rod to spy around; and the nigger at the back door was asleep, and he stuck it in the back of his neck and come back. This letter said:
Don't betray me, I wish to be your friend. There is a desprate gang of cut-throats from over in the Indian Territory going to steal your runaway nigger to-night, and they have been trying to scare you so as you will stay in the house and not bother them. I am one of the gang, but have got religgion and wish to quit it and lead an honest life again, and will betray the helish design. They will down from northards, along the fence, at midnight exact, with a false key, and go in the nigger's cabin to get him. I am to be off a piece and blow a tin horn if I see any danger; but stead of that I will BA like a sheep soon as they get in and not blow at all; then whilst they are getting his chains loose, you slip there and lock them in, and can kill them at your leasure. Don't do anything but just the way I am telling you; if you do they will suspicion something and raise whoop-jamboreehoo. I do not wish any reward but to know I have done the right thing. UNKNOWN FRIEND.
到早上,我们到林里买了一只铁丝编的耗子笼子,拿了回来,又把最好的一个耗子洞重
新挖开了。才只个把钟头,就捉到了十五只顶呱呱的大耗子。我们把笼子放到了萨莉阿姨床
底下一个最安全可靠的地方。可是啊,我们去捉蜘蛛的当儿,给小汤姆斯·佛兰克林·朋杰
明·杰佛逊·费尔贝斯①发现了。他打开了笼子,看看耗子会不会出来,而耗子果然出来
了。萨莉阿姨走了进来。当我们走回家时,只见她正站在床头大叫大喊,而耗子正在表现它
们的拿手好戏给她解解闷。所以她一见我们,便抄起木棍,揍了我们一顿。我们不得不重新
花了两个钟头才另外搞到了十五六只。那个爱淘气的小鬼就是这么跟我们捣乱。而且这回捉
到的又不象样。赶不上第一批那种精英之辈。象第一批那么棒的,我还没见过哩。
①当时普通人家给儿子取名,经常取历史上大人物的姓作为名字,几乎每家都有叫
华盛顿的,还有从拜伦或司各特作品中人物取名字的。
①诺顿版注:指当年的俄克拉荷马,当时为印第安人领地,不法之徒不少。
我们又弄到了挺棒的一大批各式各样的蜘蛛、屎壳郎、毛毛虫、癞蛤蟆,还有许多别的
东西。我们本想弄到一个马蜂窝,后来没有弄成。那一家子正在窝里呢。我们并没有就此罢
休,而是跟它们比一比耐性的劲儿,因为我们知道,在耗时间上不是它们把我们轰跑,就是
我们把它们轰跑,结果是它们胜了。我们找了点草药,在给蜂子蜇过的地方擦了擦,就好得
差不多了,不过坐下来的时候还不怎么灵便。于是我们去捉蛇,捉到了二三十来条花蛇和家
蛇,放进了一只袋子里,随后放到了我们的房间里。这时正是吃晚饭的时间,忙忙碌碌干了
一整天,肚子饿不饿呢?——哦,不,我看是不饿!等到我们回来,一看,一条蛇都不见了
——我们没有把袋口扎紧,蛇就溜跑了。不过问题还不大,因为它们总还在这房子里嘛。因
此我们认为,总能把一部分捉回来吧。不,有好一阵子,这间屋里可真是闹起了蛇的天下。
时不时的,你能看见房椽子上等处地方突然掉下一条蛇来,往往掉到了你的菜盘子里,或是
掉到了你的背上,你的脖子上,而且多半总是在你不愿见到它的时间里掉下来。说起来,这
些蛇还长得挺漂亮,身上一条条花纹。这些蛇,即便是一百万条吧,也害不了人。可是在萨
莉阿姨眼里,蛇就没有什么好歹之分。她讨厌蛇,不管它是哪一种、哪一类。不管你怎么
说,只要是蛇,她就受不了。每逢有一条蛇跌到她身上,不论她正在干着什么,她就一概丢

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